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Showing posts with label forgiveness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label forgiveness. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 25, 2018

#TuesdayTreasures Guest post by Dale Vernor

Good Morning Friends,

When today's guest contacted me I was unsure about how his message would resonate with YOU, my audience. After all, you're used to hearing what authors treasure and learning about their books. 

But I think his message is uplifting and definitely something to treasure so please welcome Dale Vernor....



Treasuring My Sobriety After Alchol Rehab
I look at my daughter now and I know I would do absolutely anything to protect her, to ensure her happiness. But there was a time not too long ago when I couldn’t say that — even in my most drunken moments.
Yes. I’m an alcoholic.
I am one of those fortunate ones who had help, who was forced to get help. And just in the nick of time, alcohol rehab changed my life. Today I treasure my family and in order to be the best for them I have to also treasure my sobriety, if it were not for finding it, I would have no family to love so dearly.

It Wasn’t Bad… In the Beginning


I used to tell myself that alcohol wasn’t all bad because I met my wife in a bar. She was celebrating a cousin’s engagement and she noticed me sitting alone in the bar. She approached me then and there. I should’ve been mortified. But I already had a couple of glasses in me and I readily answered all her questions. I think she really believed I liked her, too. I think it was only later that she realized that I was so flirty with her because I was already drunk.
She always said she didn’t mind that I drank more than she did. She said I was a sweet and quiet when I was drunk. And then she got pregnant and there wasn’t really time for us to think.
After the baby was born, my drinking got worse. It’s scary being in charge of a whole person. You need liquid courage; at least that’s what I told myself. I felt I enjoyed my time with the baby more when I had a few sips. I was more relaxed.

My Wife Knew I Had a Problem

Once, my stash of vodka in the laundry room disappeared. I think, like me, she was trying to deny it.
Until she came home early one day and saw me lying face down, naked a few feet from my robe and the crib. The baby’s face was already red from crying and her bottom was irritated from a very soggy diaper. It could’ve been worse, but it was enough for her. The next day, my daughter spent the day at a childcare center while my wife  brought me to an alcohol rehab facility.
That was more than three years ago.

What I Learned

One of the most important things I learned in rehab was that I had to forgive myself for what I had done in the past, while the alcohol still had its grip on me. It’s not easy. I look at my little girl and wonder what damage I had caused. But I strive to do it, and not as a punishment, but as a way to endure.
My story could have gone in a different direction. My wife and I didn’t really know each other all that well when we got married. I am grateful that she stayed with me throughout and didn’t take the baby and leave. I’m also very thankful that she enrolled me in alcohol rehab.
I cannot describe the wonder of looking at my daughter with eyes not blurred by alcohol. I am amazed at how interesting and funny her three-year-old stories can be. I cannot bear to imagine being drunk and not being able to enjoy them.
And when I go out with my wife, orange juice or ginger ale gives me a buzz when coupled with her boisterous laugh.

Every Day is Wonderful

I can smell the flowers that we planted together. I can taste the different dishes I prepare for them.
And in five months, we will welcome a new member to our family and I’m so excited. Not that I’m void of any apprehension. But I’m in a good place right now—full of gratitude and love for my family and for myself. I have faced obstacles in the past and can confidently say that I can squarely face the challenges ahead.

Thank you so much, Dale for sharing your story! We wish you the BEST of luck and God's blessings as you continue to walk out your journey.

PamT

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

#TuesdayTreasures LOVE and Forgiveness

Happy Valentine's Day!

When this time of year rolls around we all think of LOVE.... the people in our lives whom we love, those we've loved and lost and those we wish we could love. It's another day set aside in each year to remind us that love is a powerful thing and something we should treasure.

More than treasure, love is something we should aspire to live and express on a daily, moment-by-moment basis.

Think about all those people you don't understand or dislike and take a few moments to send them love.

Can't do it?

Then start with peace or joy or happiness or forgiveness. Forgive them and forgive yourself for your lack of love toward them.

The Bible teaches us that Forgiveness and Love are a choice. Therefore, even if you don't actually "feel" the warm, fuzzy emotions. Choose love. Be willing to forgive.

There's a lot of power in praying.... "Lord I can't do this but I'm willing to forgive, I'm willing to say the words, I'm willing to have a change of heart. I'm willing to see this person or this situation through YOUR eyes. Help me."

One of the most powerful prayers I've learned in my studies of spirituality is "I forgive you and I release you to God."

Simple words that have the ability to change lives.

Again, even if you don't actually feel this, saying the words opens your mind and eventually your heart to free yourself and, in turn, your offender.

Try it, you'll be amazed and I'll bet you'll feel better physically, mentally and emotionally.

Something to think about!
"Inspirational with an Edge!" 

If you're looking for a Valentine's day gift to send to someone consider my devotional Love is a Rose which parallels the love of God to the words of the song "The Rose" available in Ebook, Kindle and Nook. Also in Print an at Deeper Shopping!


Hope you enjoyed today's post and you'll drop by each week for Tuesday Treasures, Thursday Thoughts and Saturday Spotlight!

Until next time take care and God bless.
PamT

Thursday, October 20, 2016

#ThursdayThoughts Random Ramblings on Addiction & Judgement

Good Morning Friends,

It's been a while since I shared thoughts with you but these two situations have come up in my life and in the lives of those I love so I thought I's speak with you about them.

Many times we are quick to judge someone's actions and/or addictions based on what we think their life should be. True, many addictions are unhealthy and lead to pain and destruction.

But what about those 'lesser' addictions?

Gossip, or shopping, or exercise, or any number of things we consider to be less devastating, even something a simple as negativity or exploring different aspects of spirituality. Granted some of these seemingly 'lesser' things can lead to, at the very least, worse behavior and at most, danger.

But not always.

Addiction like everything is a heart issue. A mindset.

I'll be the first to admit my addiction is Reading.

Some of you may laugh, many will relate, but in reality, anything that causes a person to forfeit sleep or food or camaraderie with the people with whom we have a relationship is unhealthy for all involved.

I, like many, feed my addiction in binges....I'll go for days or weeks without reading then something will spark in me and I'll read several novels in as many days, sometimes foregoing things like meals or exercise. Even sleep.

Wouldn't it be healthier for me to read daily?

Maybe.

I've always been an avid reader and no matter how long I go between binges, my love affair with the written word is real, sometimes consuming.

Now please don't think I'm making light of other, 'real' addictions.....Drugs, Alcohol, Obsessive Behavior.

And here's where the judgement part comes in. Unless we are REALLY hurting someone, we tend to think in boxes labeled Right, Wrong, Not so Bad, Insane....

We tend to judge on so many levels.... She can't be a Christian if she writes erotica.

She writes edgy...God can't be happy--after all that kind of writing doesn't really glorify Him.

They were friends the whole time each was married to someone else...now they're together...wonder how long that was going on?

He smokes, drinks, gambles....SIN...Judgement...

If you've known me long you know I don't write to condemn but to encourage and edify and that's all I'm trying to do here.

Jesus said to us, "Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you."

In what area(s) are you/we holding up the light of judgement when really we should be loving unconditionally and praying for those whom we judge? After all, the Bible does state, "All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."

Something to think about!
"Inspirational with an Edge!" 


In my story, Review of Love Kylie Ericson and Jason Stockwell deal with the issue of judging......

Jason Stockwell has been commissioned to interview Kylie Erickson and to review her books. Only problem is, she won’t give the time of day much less an interview to someone whose type of writing she deems not worthy of respect. Can they suspend their judgmental attitudes and find true love? Find out in Review of Love....

Enjoy this short, FREE read from Pelican Book Group/White Rose Publishing then tell me what you think....

I hope you enjoyed today's random ramblings and that you'll return each week for  Tuesday Treasures, Thursday Thoughts, Saturday Spotlight.

Another great book (which I finished reading this morning...yes during a binge...the 2nd novel I've completed since Monday night) is A Moment of Weakness by Karen Kingsbury and it is a great example of what I'm talking about here AND I haven't read Forgiveness by Marianne Evans yet but from what I understand, this book is a shining example of today's topics.  Check 'em out!

Until next time, take care and God bless.
PamT