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Showing posts with label healing from grief. Show all posts
Showing posts with label healing from grief. Show all posts

Saturday, March 5, 2022

#SaturdaySpotlight is on Uschi Nagel & From Loss to Love!

Good Morning!

We're taking advantage of the warmer temps here and brought the camper out for the weekend. Although windy, lots of sunshine is wonderful and makes sitting outside not thinking about anything important a welcomed reprieve from daily tasks.

My guest today is an Australian Counselor and Author and her book is one we can all benefit from, so please welcome Uschi Nagel and From Loss to Love!

"A beautiful gift book for someone grieving a beloved pet. Loving, gentle and kind.

All too many of us experience the tragic passing of a furry companion and commonly find ourselves unable to cope with what has happened.

What if you turned inward to the grief about losing your beloved pet? Instead of pushing feelings of loss aside to move on, what would happen if you honored this tragic loss with reverence and self-compassion?

What if grieving was honoring the life your pet lived?

Allow yourself to feel these emotions, because they are neither good nor bad, they just are.

This book provides comfort and practical coping strategies to navigate the grief process. It has been created to gently support and assist you on your journey from Loss to Love."

Excerpt: "We all feel it.

The bond with our pet is unique and strong.

Some say it is because the Love from an animal is unconditional.

You treasure the precious life experiences you've shared with friends and family.

Adventures with your beloved pet are no different.

After all, they often experience the ordinary and extraordinary moments of life with us before other people do.

They're there in times of tragedy,

and in times of joy.

For birthdays.

For promotions.

For life milestones.

For loss. And birth.

And rain storms. And days with the flu.

They are by our side for the moments that make up life."

Uschi Nagel, a qualified Counselor and undercover crazy cat lady with a passion for all four-legged fur friends and their humans.

Many people experience the tragic passing of an animal companion and commonly find themselves struggling to cope with what has happened. Uschi understands the complexity of dealing with this challenge and focuses on supporting people after losing a beloved pet.

After the sudden death of her dog Sunny, Uschi wrote her first book “From Loss to Love”, which gives comfort and practical support to assist on the painful journey after pet loss.

Uschi lives in Australia with her family and one pompous black cat, she loves the beach and adores Batman.  You can find her on the web at www.uschinagel.com

Get your copy of From Loss to Love at Amazon, B&N and Indibound.org!

Sounds like a lovely work, Uschi. Thank you for sharing with us today! We certainly wish you the best of luck and God's blessings in your endeavors.

That's it for today, Friends. See you next week for Wednesday Words with Friends and Saturday Spotlight!

PamT

Wednesday, February 26, 2020

#WednesdayWordswithFriends welcomes Justin Thomas

Good Morning!

Today we begin our Lenten season of fasting, prayer and alms-giving. Even if you're not Catholic or one of the other religions that participates in extra, focused prayer during these forty days leading up to Easter, it's always a good thing to set aside time to spend with God.

Today's guest talks about his own personal journey through tragedy and grief into new life and purpose. Please welcome Justin Thomas as he shares his journey with us.....

Q: What motivated you to write this book?
A: After losing my father, I went on a soul-searching journey to explore how to carry on his legacy. I assumed this would be just my own personal journey. However, along the way I was exposed to so many life-changing experiences and relationships that I became motivated to share the story with others. This book shares the gift that I was given— a new definition of what it means to become a provider.

Q: You dad's death was sudden and unexpected. What would share with others who have faced similar losses on how to deal with the grief?
A: Unfortunately, a friend of mine texted me just last week asking this question. He told me, "I started reading your book and could not get past page three. I also received a call last night. Same exact thing happened to my dad. I am sitting at the airport trying to tell myself everything will be okay." I thanked him for sharing this hard news with me. This is the first step in dealing with grief: sharing with others. I encouraged my friend to take a firm hold of his family and values during a time when the world beneath him is no longer on solid ground. Conversations and moments like this make me grateful for the experience I have had in order to try and provide for others going through a similar journey.

Q: How do you define a provider and how do you believe scripture defines it?
A: A provider specifically provides blessings and offers protection to others. Here is my provider definition: Provider = Bless + Protect. This is the proven provider process. The exciting news is that anyone can develop the habits and skills to consistently bless and protect others. I share my personal journey with a biblical perspective of what it means to provide. Psalm 23 positioned Jesus as our model provider, one who blesses his sheep by selflessly giving of himself to earn the trust of his sheep. Jesus even called himself the “Good Shepherd” in John 10: “I am the good shepherd. I lay down my life for the sheep.” Scripture ultimately defines a provider as one who is willing to sacrifice for others.

Q: You list “Santa” and “Soldier” on what you call the “Bless and Protect” matrix. Talk about that.
A: When creating the Bless and Protect 2x2 matrix I knew there would be people strong in one area but weak in the other. I evaluated my own life and explored when were times that I was high in Blessing and low in Protecting and vice versa to arrive with the Santa and Soldier quadrant. Santa represents someone who is generous and loving, but lacks the guiding hand of a protector. They default to solving problems and burdens through gifts, which certainly blesses others, but it does not fully satisfy the need. The Santa quadrant allows you to stay in the safe space of giving more and more and receiving praise for your apparent generosity. It’s a fun quadrant to be in, both for the giver and receiver, yet there is a deeper version of providing. The soldier is high on the protect trait, but low on the bless trait. He represents someone who is strong and reliable but lacks the softer, blessing characteristics. On the one hand, people may feel safe around “soldiers,” but hesitant to be vulnerable and open to such a harsh figure. 

Q: Why do you feel teaching men to be providers is important?
A: After speaking with other men, the typical definition of being a provider was the 1950’s Dad figure bringing home a paycheck as the pinnacle of providing. I felt it was important to challenge this baseline definition to change from “bringing in the money” to “blessing and protecting.”

Q: Talk about the C.L. Thomas Fellowship, its vision, and the plans for expansion.
A: The CL Thomas Fellowship offers small groups and online resources to help others become providers. The fellowship was started in 2017 in honor of my father who passed away that same year. The first small group launched from my living room and now we have several groups in the Raleigh-Durham area and Dublin, Ireland as we continue to expand our reach and influence.  Groups launched are led by a mentor or “provider coaches” who believe that each member can be a great provider. The mentor facilitates monthly meetings and models a provider lifestyle. In addition, the fellowship offers a growing library of recorded interviews from experts in different areas of the Provider Wheel. We are building a community of people from all walks of life who strive to help one another become better providers. One of the most exciting new additions is that my wife, Amy Thomas, is now leading a women’s C.L. Thomas Fellowship group. The women’s group takes the same Provider Wheel and calling to bless and protect others through the unique perspective and gifts that God has placed on their lives as women.

Q: What is the Provider Wheel? 
A: The Provider Wheel is a visual I created to highlight the eight characteristic traits of a provider. We spend one month on each trait during the course of the C.L. Thomas Fellowship small groups. The Bless and Protect Matrix is another visual I use to show what happens when we do not bless and protect others, we fall from the "provider quadrant" and into other quadrants that limit our impact of effectively becoming a provider.

Q: What do you hope readers will gain from this book?
A: Here’s what I hope for this short book: that readers will commit to being a great provider based on the incredible, imperfect legacy of C.L. Thomas or “Pop,” as he was known to my family. And that readers will change their definition of “provider” in which they make a covenant to bless and protect anyone who needs their specific gifts. I want readers to remember that providing on Earth is ultimately an imitation of Jesus and His life’s example.

Justin Thomas is the co-founder of the C.L. Thomas Fellowship, a nonprofit that coaches men and women to become providers based on a biblical worldview. He is a National Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach and is COO of EHOP Health, a chronic disease reversal company. He previously served as CEO of CrossComm, a nationally-recognized app development studio, and was named “MBA Student of the Year” at Ireland’s leading business school. He lives in Hillsborough, North Carolina with his wife and family. Visit www.clthomasfellowship.org.

Find out more about Becoming a Provider and the CL Thomas Fellowship by watching these two videos: https://youtu.be/4LyjuCt0zD4 and https://youtu.be/HAOWHTRw9Lg

Thank you so much, Justin for sharing your heart, book and ministry with us! We certainly wish you the best of luck and God's blessings.

Well friends, hope you enjoyed today's guest. This is the last Wednesday Words with Friends post for February and Saturday is the last spotlight so be sure to leave a comment and be entered into my monthly gift card giveaway!

Until next time, take care and God bless.
PamT

Thursday, March 9, 2017

#ThursdayThoughts Guest post / #EggcerptExchange with Linda McLaughlin

Good Morning Friends!

Today is the first of our EggCerpt Exchange features!

Our guest, Linda McLaughlin (aka: @Lyndi Lamont) has shared thoughts and treasures and been in our spotlight before, so please give her a warm welcome back!


Grief is Like an Ocean…

"Grief is like the ocean; it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is
calm & sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim." - Vicki Harrison

I love this quote. I can't think of a more apt analogy for grief than an ocean.

Grief begins with a shock akin to an earthquake of epic proportions, followed by a tsunami of emotions: disbelief, denial, anger, guilt, and above all an overwhelming sadness that engulfs your whole being. It takes a while for the tsunami to recede, leaving you feeling adrift in a turbulent ocean.

After a while, the turbulence decreases and there are periods of smooth sailing, but like the ocean, grief is seemingly endless and unpredictable. There will be squalls during which we experience what the professionals call a STUG: a short, temporary upsurge of grief. And sometimes there are storms of emotion. These usually occur at some pivotal moment: a holiday, a birthday, an anniversary, when thoughts of the lost loved one are impossible to deny or keep at bay.

And then the ocean smooths out again and we go back to living moment to moment, waiting for... we know not what. Does grief ever end? Not really, though the storms and squalls diminish over time until the loved one becomes a cherished memory rather than an open wound of the heart.

My heroine in Lily and the Gambler is still mourning the death of her lover when she arrives in California to start a new life.


Wow, Linda, never heard of STUG but I know exactly what you mean! Please tell us a little more about Lily & the Gambler your Sensual Western Historical Romance

Respectability is in the eye of the beholder. Or so Lily Penhallow hopes when she assumes the guise of the widow Albright. She has learned the price of flaunting convention and is determined to obey society's rules from now on. After her lover, Nigel Albright, was killed in a duel over a card game, Lily dons widow’s weeds and travels to Grass Valley, California where she plans to marry the man her uncle works for, a respectable mine owner named Hugh Ogilvie. Then, on the riverboat from San Francisco, she meets Creighton 'King' Callaway, a professional gambler, just the kind of man she should avoid.

King believes that since life is a gamble, there's no point in planning for the future. You have to trust Lady Luck. After meeting Lily, King knows he has found his Queen of Hearts. But can he convince her to pass up a sober businessman for a foot-loose card sharp?

Only Lady Luck knows for sure...

Buy links:
Coming Soon to Other Retailers

Excerpt:

Callaway looked at her curiously. “Were you married long?”
“We were together for five years,” Lily said. Her words were true as far as they went. She hoped Mr. Callaway wouldn’t ask too many questions about her husband. It still astonished her that she had told more lies since she became respectable than in her entire unconventional life.
“You must miss him.”
“Yes,” she said, swallowing the lump that suddenly lodged in her throat. Unwelcome tears sprang to her eyes and spilled onto her cheeks. She blinked rapidly to stop the tears.
Mr. Callaway pulled out his handkerchief and dabbed at her face. “Better now?”
“Yes. Please forgive me for breaking down. I’m usually not weepy.”
He gave her a reassuring smile. “No apology necessary. You suffered a terrible loss. I admire your strength and determination.”
“Do you?”
“Yes, ma’am. And your pretty blue eyes.”
She felt a blush heat her cheeks, but had to smile. “Are you flirting with me, sir?”
“I’m giving it my best shot,” he said with a grin that quickly faded. “Mrs. Albright, I know this is none of my business, but I don’t think it wise for you to travel alone. I doubt your husband would have approved.”
Lily turned back to stare at the sea of stars above, seeming almost within reach. Would Nigel approve of what she was doing? Yes, she decided. He’d been the consummate adventurer. He wouldn’t have expected her to live the rest of her life wrapped in cotton wool. And his death had given her greater freedom than she’d ever known. It was both frightening and exhilarating.
Creighton Callaway seemed to take her silence for agreement. “Please, at least allow me to see you safely on the train.”
Lily spun around to stare at him. “And in return?”
He spread his hands. “I expect nothing in return but the pleasure of your company. I have a widowed mother and sister. If either one was forced to travel alone, I would worry.”
Ah, so he thought women were too weak to take care of themselves. A typical male notion. “I’ve gotten this far on my own, Mr. Callaway, and my journey is almost over.”
“Mrs. Albright, you are not in England anymore. I grant you California is more civilized than it was twenty years ago, but it’s not what you are used to.”
Lily thought about the men she’d seen wearing gun belts and suppressed a shudder. Perhaps she should accept his offer. Once she reached Grass Valley and Uncle Arthur, she need never see the man again.
“I suppose you have a point, and I’d appreciate help with my trunks and sewing machine. Very well, Mr. Callaway. I place myself in your capable hands.” The image of his hands on her skin sent a shiver through her, but she suppressed the notion. The last person she needed in her life now was another gambler.

GREAT blurb, excerpt and cover, Linda! Tell us more about yourself and how readers can reach you.....

Linda McLaughlin grew up with a love of books and history, so it's only natural she prefers writing historical romance. She loves transporting her readers into the past where her characters learn that, in the journey of life, love is the sweetest reward. Linda also writes steamy to erotic romance under the name Lyndi Lamont, and is one half of the writing team of Lyn O'Farrell. A native of Pittsburgh, PA. she now lives in Southern California.

You can find her online at http://lindalyndi.com
Twitter: @Lyndi Lamont https://twitter.com/LyndiLamont



Thanks for joining us for our Eggcerpt Exchange folks! I'm on Linda's blog today too so check it out and be sure to join us each week for Tuesday Treasures, Thursday Thoughts and Saturday Spotlight.

Until next time, take care and God Bless.
PamT

Thursday, November 19, 2015

#ThursdayThoughts: Special Guest post by Marion Ueckermann!

Good Morning Friends,

Today my fellow PBG author, Marion Ueckermann visits with some thoughts about life and loved ones.....

I SEE YOU
Mommy, this morning, like every morning, I tuck the pink teddy I gave you years ago when you had your shoulder operation, and the brown one I got with my own shoulder op, against my pillows. I fold up the cream and beige blanket and place it at the bottom of my bed—your birthday gift this year from me—and I remember how much you loved sleeping under its soft covering. My thoughts turn to Dad’s crocodile tail lamp we’ll be fetching this weekend—a hunting trophy that through the art of taxidermy he turned into a light source that’s been in our family home for decades. I think of the framed ribbon embroidery landscape that hangs on my lounge wall—a gift from Hanlie, and of the hours of needlework done by her late mother to create it. These things now grace my home, and fill my life, because you all don’t.

I’d forgotten about my scheduled blog today on Thursday’s Thoughts. Fortunately I had written this blog one morning about a month ago. I forgot because life, if I can call it that, has gotten in the way. You see, at the end of last year, my mother fell ill. Heart failure the doctor said. For months we watched her steadily decline. We prayed for God to strengthen her and, dared we even hope, heal? Until the night before her death when we earnestly prayed the hardest prayer—“Your will be done. Lord, heal her quick, or take her fast.”  In the presence of my sister and two nieces—and without a doubt from the wonder in my mother’s eyes, Jesus and a myriad of angels—our prayers were answered as my dearest Mom stepped out of our lives and into an eternity with her Savior. That was life up until July 17 this year.
We gave Mom the most beautiful funeral, filled with hope and praise for her life, and the life that she now lives.

Dad couldn’t remember you had gone, Mommy. Altzheimers does that. But we could see how much he missed you, how empty his life was without you at his side, although we tried to fill it with our love and attention. He’d been so sick with flu the week you landed in hospital. The day you passed away, I had him at the doctor. Bronchial pneumonia they said, but he didn’t need hospitalization, just nebulizing and physio.

We gave Daddy the best nursing we could, but 17 days after you died, we rushed him to emergency. He lay in ICU for nine long days, struggling to get well again. And he seemed to be. But a week after the ICU trips began, he took a turn and we watched him regress. Once again we had to pray—“Your will be done. Heal him quick, Lord, or take him fast.” The awful mask that pressed tight against his face, breathing for him…his hands that were tied to the bed so he couldn’t remove the mask or pull out the feeding tubes—they were all too much to bear. For him, and for us.

Still, the call from the hospital the next morning was unexpected. We tried so hard to get there in time, but were too late. By minutes. Thirty-three days of separation from you were all Daddy could bear. A week later we stared into your open grave again as we laid Daddy to rest at the place he’s been for nearly 66 years—beside you.

We have come to learn to thank God you didn’t have to do life without each other. But it’s still hard for each of us who are left behind.

Eight days after we buried Daddy, we waved goodbye to Lenny and Hanlie. They immigrated to Scotland. Yet another sad goodbye, but at least we have Skype and WhatsApp—we can still chat to our brother and sister-in-law on a daily basis if we like. And we can visit them, too. If only heaven had Skype. If only I could send you an instant message, and you could send one back. If only heaven wasn’t a one-way destination.

But I thank God that I still see you here in life. I see you and Dad in peanut brittles, Nic-Naks chips, Turkish delight, and beetroot salad (the sweet and sour one) standing on Pick ‘n Pay shelves. I see you each time I make a potato salad. I see you in garlic plants with their delicate mauve blooms (how you loved that color), and in the red Christ Thorn blooms. I see you in the list of all your favorite foods that decorate Ryan’s kitchen wall. I see you in the jersey keeping Hanlie warm in Scotland, the one that hung in your cupboard since I was a little girl. And I hear you…in a joke I suddenly remember you enjoyed telling, in the choruses at church you loved to sing. And I see you, I hear you, in the faith and love of our family.

As I stare into my tear-filled eyes, the same shade of brown as yours, mirrored as I do my makeup this morning, I see you…for I am, and always will be, a part of you. You and Dad live on through each and every one of your children and grandchildren in so many ways. Every day.

In the Old Testament God commanded people at various times to build altars of stone to remind them of what He had done for them. The pink and brown teddies that lie side by side on my bed each day are my pile of stones, for every morning they remind me of you, of your lives, and of how incredibly blessed I was to have had such a wonderful mom and dad for so many years.

Every day, I see you. Every day, I hear you. Every day, I miss you.


What a lovely tribute....

We've all lost loved one's, but it is especially difficult when you lose them close together. I know, since last year my Mother in Law and Mother passed away within days of each other. 

The holidays are extremely difficult to enjoy when missing those who've passed on, so take extra care of yourself, Marion and Each and Every one of YOU dear Friends!

Oh and if you're looking for something to read over the Thanksgiving Holiday, check out Marion's newest release, Oslo Overtures or her debut PBG title, Helsinki Sunrise, both Passport to Romance titles!

MARION UECKERMANN's passion for writing was sparked when she moved to Ireland with her family. Her love of travel has influenced her contemporary inspirational romances set in novel places. She now lives in South Africa in an empty nest with her husband and their crazy black Scottie, Wally. http://www.marionueckermann.com


 Until next time...take care and God Bless!
PamT

Thursday, September 25, 2014

#ThursdayThoughts: Moving Through Grief

Good Morning Friends,

You know I try to use this feature to encourage and uplift and today is no different despite the title of this post.

If you've followed me long, you'll know that my husband, my heart, my soul mate passed away in 2009 and that I've found myself in this jungle called single-hood. From the time I could articulate, my dream was to be married and have babies so I've never been comfortable being single.

"They" (whoever the hell 'they' are) say one of the signs of moving on is when you can look back without as much pain.

I can attest to that.

In the last five years I've done everything in my power to get through this valley of death. I've prayed, cried, loved and yet, there's still a place in my heart that literally aches and I'm not sure that will ever totally cease.

But at least I can say I'm don't feel as though I'm crawling through quicksand anymore.

Anyway, yesterday I saw this on Face Book and well.. it pretty much explains how I feel.....



 I believe this is true no matter who you are grieving.

A friend who recently lost a spouse said, "trying to figure out who I am now is the crazy part."

That too, is true.

No matter the fact you maintain your separate identities throughout the relationship, you still feel as though you're only half a person and that you have no idea who you are anymore.

But God does and He knows the great things in store for you!

So let me encourage you today.... If you find yourself in the pit of despair because God has called your loved one home, hang in there and when you begin to see the light at the end of the tunnel and realize it is not a freight train, ask Him to show you a new vision for your life.

Something to think about!
"Inspirational with an Edge! 

Thursday, December 5, 2013

Thursday Thoughts: Bent but not Broken

Good Morning!

The weather has been absolutely gorgeous the last couple of days but that wasn't the case Sunday. Cold, damp, misty....the perfect reflection of my mood.

That may sound strange to you because I always try to be upbeat and positive, but if you read my Thanksgiving post or follow me on Facebook, you'll know that Friday (the 29th) was my deceased husband's birthday which made for a tough couple of days. Add to that the workload here at the Silver Spur Guest Ranch and by Sunday I was ready to just go ahead and have that nervous break down I keep putting off.

So I took a prayer walk (hike actually since the terrain here is hilly and rocky).

Out on the trail I found this horseshoe .....



......My initial thought was, "I might be bent but I'm not broken."

So I picked it up and began to thank God for the blessings in my life, for the good I've experienced, the good to come, and for the 20 years of wonderful memories I had with Terry. 

Some say grief is a lifelong process and that we never get over losing a loved one, especially a spouse or child. Others say the cycle is five or seven years. 

I believe grieving is a personal thing and everyone heals in their own way and time. Some assimilate the feelings and move on quickly, others take years to do so. Some never recover. 

Not sure how long it'll take me to "get over" his death or stop grieving, but I have come a long way. Although I still have moments or days of profound, intense emotion, I am grateful that they are less frequent.

This horseshoe sits on my desk with the other treasures I've found out on the trail and will serve as a reminder that no matter what life throws at me, I am strong enough to bend without breaking.

No matter what you may be grieving (the loss of your spouse, child, parent, job, marriage) take heart and remember.... You might be bent but you are NOT broken.

Something to think about!

"Inspirational with an Edge!"