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Thursday, September 19, 2013

Thursday Thoughts: Intimacy

Good Morning Friends and welcome to another edition of Thursday Thoughts.

Although I do my best to share my heart with you every time I write or post something here, today I'm really going deeper.

I've given you my thoughts on Kisses but today I want to talk to you about intimacy.

Many folks confuse intimacy with sex but that's not what I'm talking about. I meet so many people today whose idea of being intimate is jumping into bed with someone. While that may be a wonderful experience, they don't always realize what they're missing!

Intimacy is not about getting naked with each other literally, it is however, about getting naked in every other way.

Okay so now I've got you confused. Welcome to the club LOL!

As I mentioned in my post on being single, I didn't ask to be thrust into this role. I've always felt more complete as part of a couple. I love being in a monogamous, committed relationship. I love being half of the whole!

I know, I know, you can't be half a couple unless you're a whole person and someone who has experienced the loss of a spouse (or marriage) needs time to heal and become whole, but that is not my point! (I'm getting off track here...we're supposed to be talking about intimacy)...

One thing I've learned in this time of "single-hood" is that what I miss most about being in a relationship is the intimacy....no, not the sex..the INTIMACY.

Now you think I'm weird, or frigid...let me assure you both are far from the truth! I mean, I don't write romance for nothing LOL! and I certainly know how to enjoy the natural progression and fulfillment of a physical relationship with the man I love.

That's just it though, if there is no LOVE and no INTIMACY, why then should you venture into sex?

Okay, maybe I was born in the wrong century or am just too old fashioned for my own good, but that's how I feel.

I miss being intimate, feeling cherished, and cherishing .... long, intelligent conversations, hugs and caresses, sweet, undemanding kisses....all those little things that when added together may end up culminating in physical completion, but are just as stimulating (maybe more) when they don't!

True love is more than a great sex life. True love is intimacy. True love is commitment and compromise and sometimes just deciding that whatever you disagree on is not worth fighting about, not worth losing your intimacy over, not worth the stress and drama and upset of losing sleep and peace.

If you've known me for a while, you know I write to encourage, not judge or condemn and this post is no different, so here's a little advice:

If you are single, don't compromise intimacy for sex.

If you are in a relationship, seek intimacy above all else because where there is love and intimacy, there is peace, joy and contentment.

JMHO of course, but definitely something to think about....

"Inspirational with an Edge!" (tm)


Jacqueline Seewald said...


I completely agree with you. Having been happily married for forty some years, I know about sharing with another person. Intimacy connects to love which can and should be expressed in many different small and large way, sex being only one aspect.

LoRee Peery said...

Thank you, Pam. I've tried to explain this to the males in the family. You did very well. What a blessing that through His Word, we can know our Lord intimately (even though we have to imagine the physical touch, we can be aware of His care).

Sharon Ervin said...

Very nice. Thank you for sharing. Only wish you had gone into greater depth on "the giving side" of intimacy. Opening up is often harder than encouraging another to do so. Exposing your inner person, making oneself vulnerable, requires trust. For some, trust is the leap.

HGlick said...

Nice post!

Pamela S Thibodeaux said...

You are so right Jacqueline - 40+ years...wow, congratulations! May God bless you with many more.

Yes, LoRee, intimacy with the Lord is a beautiful thing and I appreciate 'feeling' His love and care, but I do miss the human touch.

You're right Sharon, for some trust is a huge leap of faith, and now days when 'commitment' is a dirty word...well it doesn't get easier.

Thanks Heidi!

Thank you all for stopping by and commenting.


Donna B said...

God bless you, Pam! Wonderful post! Yes, the difference between sex and intimacy is another one of those disappearing tributes to this life. I'm sure most of the younger generation have no clue what this means, and even some of the older. May God continue to shine His light through each of us that others might know real love.

Pamela S Thibodeaux said...

Thanks Donna!

I know there is a "reason" why I'm currently single, I only hope these things I'm discovering can be beneficial to others!