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Tuesday, September 25, 2018

#TuesdayTreasures Guest post by Dale Vernor

Good Morning Friends,

When today's guest contacted me I was unsure about how his message would resonate with YOU, my audience. After all, you're used to hearing what authors treasure and learning about their books. 

But I think his message is uplifting and definitely something to treasure so please welcome Dale Vernor....



Treasuring My Sobriety After Alchol Rehab
I look at my daughter now and I know I would do absolutely anything to protect her, to ensure her happiness. But there was a time not too long ago when I couldn’t say that — even in my most drunken moments.
Yes. I’m an alcoholic.
I am one of those fortunate ones who had help, who was forced to get help. And just in the nick of time, alcohol rehab changed my life. Today I treasure my family and in order to be the best for them I have to also treasure my sobriety, if it were not for finding it, I would have no family to love so dearly.

It Wasn’t Bad… In the Beginning


I used to tell myself that alcohol wasn’t all bad because I met my wife in a bar. She was celebrating a cousin’s engagement and she noticed me sitting alone in the bar. She approached me then and there. I should’ve been mortified. But I already had a couple of glasses in me and I readily answered all her questions. I think she really believed I liked her, too. I think it was only later that she realized that I was so flirty with her because I was already drunk.
She always said she didn’t mind that I drank more than she did. She said I was a sweet and quiet when I was drunk. And then she got pregnant and there wasn’t really time for us to think.
After the baby was born, my drinking got worse. It’s scary being in charge of a whole person. You need liquid courage; at least that’s what I told myself. I felt I enjoyed my time with the baby more when I had a few sips. I was more relaxed.

My Wife Knew I Had a Problem

Once, my stash of vodka in the laundry room disappeared. I think, like me, she was trying to deny it.
Until she came home early one day and saw me lying face down, naked a few feet from my robe and the crib. The baby’s face was already red from crying and her bottom was irritated from a very soggy diaper. It could’ve been worse, but it was enough for her. The next day, my daughter spent the day at a childcare center while my wife  brought me to an alcohol rehab facility.
That was more than three years ago.

What I Learned

One of the most important things I learned in rehab was that I had to forgive myself for what I had done in the past, while the alcohol still had its grip on me. It’s not easy. I look at my little girl and wonder what damage I had caused. But I strive to do it, and not as a punishment, but as a way to endure.
My story could have gone in a different direction. My wife and I didn’t really know each other all that well when we got married. I am grateful that she stayed with me throughout and didn’t take the baby and leave. I’m also very thankful that she enrolled me in alcohol rehab.
I cannot describe the wonder of looking at my daughter with eyes not blurred by alcohol. I am amazed at how interesting and funny her three-year-old stories can be. I cannot bear to imagine being drunk and not being able to enjoy them.
And when I go out with my wife, orange juice or ginger ale gives me a buzz when coupled with her boisterous laugh.

Every Day is Wonderful

I can smell the flowers that we planted together. I can taste the different dishes I prepare for them.
And in five months, we will welcome a new member to our family and I’m so excited. Not that I’m void of any apprehension. But I’m in a good place right now—full of gratitude and love for my family and for myself. I have faced obstacles in the past and can confidently say that I can squarely face the challenges ahead.

Thank you so much, Dale for sharing your story! We wish you the BEST of luck and God's blessings as you continue to walk out your journey.

PamT

6 comments:

Jacqueline Seewald said...

Congrats on overcoming alcohol addiction! Hope you will continue on this course.

Kara O'Neal said...

Wow! How wonderful. Your story is so inspiring. Congratulations the new baby and all the hard work you've put in. It's amazing! Thank you for sharing.

Alina K. Field said...

I wish you and your family many blessings.

Alicia Dean said...

Thank you for sharing your inspiring story. I've been around alcoholism my entire life and I know the damage the disease can do. Blessings to you and your family.

Susan Coryell said...

A courageous post and I commend you for your honesty--and your sobriety. Continued blessings on you and your family.

Diane Burton said...

It's not easy to admit an addiction and seek help for it. Congratulations! Wishing you much success in continuing your sobriety.